Yes..I am back..after long..not because I never wanted to
write and share but because I never felt the need for it..never really thought
I could ever say something out in this big, bad world..
What brings me back again is the same sad reason that
brought me to blogging years ago..I wish there were better reasons now..but I
guess it’s a part of me now..having the same old cycle repeat like a déjà vu..
yet I could do nothing but be helpless like every time..sad but true..
I chose to blog because I know someone will at least read
this and listen to my part of the story as well unlike the ones who I wished to
say a lot to but never had the time, patience, or whatever it takes to listen
to me..Its like shouting out loud in this whole big world where you know no one
would get back to you and really make you feel weird or awkward or even worse..
Same sad story..that happened before..happens again..the
only difference being the earlier one was over a couple of years and this one
being over a couple of months..any other difference that I can see..NOT REALLY!
May be because I happen to be with the similar kind of people
or may be I think they are similar..whatever..
Not that its been a sad story all while long..the sad part
being the way it ended..when it boils
down to a fight within you..a fight between
the brain and the heart..a fight between
the ego and the self-respect..a fight between the wrong and the right..a fight
between to hold on or let go..
I always heard that there’s a fine line between ego and
self-respect..but I really wonder how many of us even know about it..how many
of us really know the difference between anger and insult..how many of us
really know what can be forgiven and what can not be..
It’s a sad phase of life..when you go through a complete
whirlpool of emotions and are all alone in this world..left with no one to
share it with..its a vacuum inside that eats you to the core..its an emptiness
inside that kills you..to the point of agony..
I wonder where to go from here..what to do and what not
to..its the puzzle time again where I don’t know what would fit in where and
what would the ultimate picture look like..I give up today..only with a hope of
rising up tomorrow and facing it again..be stronger and better..all by myself..
